Exercising control by letting go

controlControl is an illusion – I am powerless.

I am powerless over other people, places, things and many situations. As I have listened to others describe people and situations that they have no control over, I realized that I often try to control and manipulate also.

In the past, I can see times where I have tried to exert control with no effect. I thought that if only I could do or say the “right” things that other people would not be “mad” at me. I have done or said things to try and distract people from talking about or doing things that I did not want them to. By doing and saying or not doing or saying things I have sought to gain acceptance and love from people.  I was trying to be what I thought others wanted. This only pushed people away, lowered my self-esteem and made me feel angry and unsatisfied with myself.

As I look at myself I constantly see places where I need to let go. Sometimes I still want other people to change so I can be happy. I even try to control the direction and speed of my own recovery process.

It takes me time to see what and who I am trying to control. As I figure it out, I can take steps to let go and remember that I am powerless over others. I can put the focus back on me – the only thing that I can control.

Sometimes I feel Powerless

Powerless

I often fight feeling of powerless and stuck. We are children of God and we can choose to act to improve our circumstances. We are not to always be silent and just acted upon.

Support groups are one way I can choose to act to improve myself. Support groups have helped me learn how to apply the atonement to my life and to my circumstances. This is a great adventure that I am so thankful for. I am thankful for the growth and help Heavenly Father blesses us with through the spouse and family support groups. To me this program is great evidence of God’s love specifically for us as loved ones of those with addictions.