What if questions make me fearful worried and anxious.
“What if…” Too often I have said or thought these two little words that bring such fear, worry and anxiety into my life. What if my loved ones slip up again? My loved one could spend all our money and then we could not pay our bills! What if my loved one loses his job? What if my loved ones don’t come home? What if my loved one doesn’t take care of the children while I am gone? My imagination can think of lots of things to fill in the blank.
Yes, all these things could possibly happen, but they probably won’t. I am filling myself with lots of dread and am putting myself through needless suffering. Fear, worry and anxiety keep me in the past and future so I do not enjoy the present. They will not prepare me for these things if they do happen. I cannot do anything about things that have not happened.
I cannot see the future. Just because something may have happened in the past does not mean it will happen today or in the future. I can live “one day at a time” and be grateful and happy today. I can handle things as they come along.
I got caught up in worry, anxiety and fear while living with and around my loved ones with addictions. A downward spiral left me feeling these negative emotions continually. This went on for years. I never felt the spirit so I thought that God had left me behind. I believed that God only spoke to special people – like prophets.
I did not realize that I could not feel the spirit while feeling strong negative emotions. Heavenly Father knew that I was not receiving His inspiration so He put things right in front of my face that showed me that He did love me. He gave me a friend that encouraged me to go to 12 step meetings and finally took me with her.
As I began to heal and to feel peace, joy, happiness and serenity in my life I also began to feel the spirit again. I realized that God had never left me, that He was always there and walking beside me. It was the strong negative emotions that had kept me from feeling His gentle promptings.
As time went by and I gained spiritual experience I learned how to recognize inspiration from God. I learned that sometimes He lets me figure things out on my own and learn by experience. I learned to ask questions throughout the day and to trust the thoughts and feelings that come into my mind and to follow guidance quickly. I learned patience and to have peace in my life as I realized God always answers my prayers in His time.
Revelation is a gift from God that I need while I am here on this earth. It is available for everyone. I need to take time each day to be holy so that I can continue to gain spiritual experience and receive revelation. I want to always recognize that God is walking right beside me.
Mean or feeling guilty?
Why do my loved ones snap at me, say mean things or criticize me? When this happens I tend to fall back into my old coping mechanisms of hiding and feeling fear and anxiety.
My support groups tell me that my loved ones lash out at others because they feel guilty. Sometimes I just wonder why they are so mean. I don’t know why they do and say as they do. It could be for many reasons.
I do know that when I can just let it go, like water running off my back, then I am much happier. When I take it personally it can send me into an anxiety and fear episode that can be difficult to extract myself from.
Today I want to be happy and have peace and joy in my life. So, I take a deep breath, remember all the tools I have learned, choose one that applies and practice using one of my new coping methods. Soon I am able to relax. I am happier, more peaceful and joyful!
Fear and anxiety make me crazy.
Fear and anxiety leads me to crazy thinking and acting. Should I check up on my loved ones? I’ve heard in my support meetings that this is obsessing, crazy thinking and acting, and leads to stress and anxiety. But I feel that my loved ones are lying to me. Don’t I need to find out? I can’t help them if I don’t know for sure.
But, I cannot control or change anyone else but me. How quickly I return to obsessing, having illogical thinking and acting crazy! My loved ones are the ones with the addictions, why am I acting crazy? The only way out of this downward spiral is to turn back to the Savior and put my trust in Him.
I can put off the natural man that wants to blame, accuse and have “grounds”. I can trust in God and my inner wisdom which leads me to Christ, to peace, to love, to joy and to serenity. I can “let go and let God” and put my loved ones in God’s hands. I will be led to know what I need to know, to say what I need to say, and to do what I need to do.
Does God care about me?
Fear, worry and anxiety kept me from feeling God’s love, from feeling the spirit and from receiving revelation. As I have learned to let these negative feelings go, through the atonement of Jesus Christ, I have again been able to feel the spirit and recognize revelation.
Through revelation I have learned to understand my loved ones better, to look at them with compassion instead of bitterness and fear. Through revelation I have learned about my weaknesses and received help to overcome them or gifts to compensate. Through revelation I have received help to know what to do in my life, what some of my mission in life is and help to work toward those goals. Through revelation I have found that instead of thinking of life as miserable and looking forward with fear, worry and anxiety, I can look at life as an adventure and look forward with joy and anticipation at what the future will bring. This healing in my life has come through the atonement of Jesus Christ, which I am so thankful for!